Single at Christmas
One of the loneliest times of the year can be when you’re single at Christmas & during the New Year celebrations. I spent most of my 30s single and every Christmas I got really fed up. This feeling was compounded by the fact that it’s my birthday on Christmas Eve. Every year I would wake up and feel really down because there was no special man in my life to wish me happy birthday.
Every January I vowed I would not be alone the following year. I would set about creating my brand new profile for online dating. I would feel really enthusiastic and positive about finding someone. However, after a few weeks I only felt disheartened. I hated the time spent emailing back and forth when I wanted to cut to the chase and meet the person. If I did meet someone, more often than not they had lied about something such as their height, weight, age and even marital status. Why do people do that?
We get a vast number of enquiries for our matchmaking memberships from people in between Christmas and the New Year. January goes crazy with people joining. Some people tell me they had a miserable Christmas and say they do not want to spend the following year single. I do empathise with anyone who is single at Christmas and so I have put together some ideas to help get you through this period.
Make plans to see family and friends
Although you might not have a special someone this year, you are likely to have loved ones and friends to spend time with. You will always have the inquisitive relative that asks about your love life or lack of it. Just steer the conversation away from that and tell them about all the great things you have done this year and what you have planned for next year. Your relatives care about you that’s probably the reason they ask about your love life. Another wine and keep sipping and you will get through those awkward questions.
Volunteer and do some charity work
A number of my clients have worked Christmas Day for Crisis, the homeless charity who usually seek volunteers during Christmas. You can see their website here – Crisis’ website. Clients tell me they felt humbled and got great satisfaction from helping others less fortunate. They forgot about their own situation which is nothing compared to being homeless. I volunteered for Age Concern, now Age UK over the Christmas period. It’s sad how many elderly people spend Christmas alone every year.
The bonus to volunteering is you won’t be alone and in fact may even meet other likeminded people who are also single. You never know where this may lead to. So push yourself out of your comfort zone and give to someone else this year by volunteering.
If you can afford to splash out and indulge yourself with a spa break then we recommend Grayshott Spa in Hindhead, Surrey. It will also help you detox and kick-start any weight loss plan for the new Year. Equally the Brighton Metropole Spa always has a good offer on where you can indulge yourself for a day away from all the Christmas shopping and stress. Why not go with a friend or treat your mum.
Meetup is a great way to get out and about and meet people, many of whom are single. There are walking groups, book groups, philosophy, you name it, there is a Meetup group for almost every interest one can have. We run three groups which are free to join and free to attend for most of our Meetup events. Our groups are in areas we cover -Sussex, Surrey, Hampshire and West Kent. Click on the links below, have a browse and feel free to join as it’s free to do so.
Brighton Meetup covering Sussex.
Guildford Meetup covering Surrey and Hampshire
New Year’s Resolutions – this year I will find love
Finding a life partner is probably high on the list if you make New Year’s resolutions. Even if you don’t it’s still probably something you really want in your life. It’s not impossible to meet a great life partner but you cannot sit back and wait for him or her to knock on your front door one evening, that’s just not going to happen. And to all those people who tell you he or she will come along when you stop looking I say to them, rubbish! If you were seeking your dream job, would you leave it to chance? I bet you would try every avenue and make a real effort with your CV and applications. So why would you leave finding your dream partner to chance?
I believe there is someone out there for all of us it’s just a case of finding them and that’s where I come in as a matchmaker with a proven track record in the industry.
Matchmaking Full Membership
Like our members, you may have tried and tested online dating and feel jaded and disillusioned after years of trying. So you could try our pro-active Full Membership where we guarantee you a number of great people to meet who will match you on values and qualities sought in a partner. I have 70% success rate on finding clients long-term partners and usually achieve this for them within the first month or two of their membership. Sometimes it’s even on their first match.
We cannot guarantee true love, no matchmaker can. Love can only come from meeting the recommended matches so you need to be open-minded and trust me as I do this every day. What’s more I am very good at it and have introduced many happy couples who now share a life together with plenty of couples now married. Follow this link to read a selection of our Testimonials.
Our pro-active service costs a little over £100 a month, includes a professional photo for your profile, a dating coach and your guaranteed matches. You need to add up what you’ve spent on online dating over the years, I bet it is hundreds, I know mine added up to that when I was single. Believe me if you’ve paid nothing and used free sites well, you get what you pay for. Our members go on real dates with real people and find real love.
Online Dating Assistance
If you decide to use online dating then you need to spend a good two hours every evening making a conscious effort to search. Be pro-active in making contact with others online. You ought to meet the person as soon as possible to see if there is any connection. It’s not possible to tell from emailing back and forth, or speaking on the telephone whether you have any connection with someone. You simply have to meet, it’s the only way.
If you are planning to meet a stranger online then ensure you stick to the online dating safety guidelines. This goes for guys too as they can often be duped. Please report anyone suspicious to the website and the police. Do not hesitate to do both as if something feels suspicious then it most likely is suspicious. Click this link to read the Get Safe Online Online dating safety guidelines.
We offer packages to assist people that want to use online dating. For example, we can draft your profile and arrange a professional photo-shoot for you with our award-winning dating photographer. Click here to see our Online Dating Assistance packages.
So if you are single at Christmas fear not because there are lots of others just like you out there trying to find love too. You are not alone and maybe next year you may have found your perfect partner.
If you still have questions please contact us. We are always happy to have a chat. To contact us please go to our Connect page.
Author: Tara McDonnell, founder and owner of South Downs Introductions & Your Matchmaker. Tara is a trained & certified matchmaker from the Matchmaker Academy, London. She is also a proud award winner at the UK Dating Awards 2015 and a Finalist at the UK Dating Awards 2017 and 2016.